Banned from zoo.
Again?
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize