Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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