What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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