I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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