Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
