Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
