I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
i dont even know how to be here
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Randomize
