I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize