his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
