How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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