Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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