Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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