Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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