I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
