do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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