She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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