I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
