She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Randomize