why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I'm lost and stupid without you.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
