Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
