Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
