Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
