i permit you to call me
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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