At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Randomize