Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
