Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
