I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
