My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
