brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I think my fart just growled at me.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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