i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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