Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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