And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
