They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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