Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!

  (360): View more from Washington

  let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.

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  (503): i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd! (360): let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off. http://tfl.nu/xgs8
  Replies (22) Good night (2010) Bad night (822)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.

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  (732): You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up. http://tfl.nu/jzsw
  Replies (8) Good night (696) Bad night (3052)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter

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  (914): Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter http://tfl.nu/3hf7
  Replies (128) Good night (2614) Bad night (3846)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions

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  (262): i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions http://tfl.nu/1ufy
  Replies (33) Good night (4301) Bad night (845)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him

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  (304): His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him http://tfl.nu/2mpu
  Replies (15) Good night (3469) Bad night (1919)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable

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  (716): right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable http://tfl.nu/dvma
  Replies (14) Good night (6080) Bad night (1047)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.

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  (512): He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone. http://tfl.nu/7h78
  Replies (8) Good night (892) Bad night (3060)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.

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  (713): We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning. http://tfl.nu/f21r
  Replies (2) Good night (2174) Bad night (560)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.

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  (512): I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW. http://tfl.nu/y0o7
  Replies (4) Good night (1323) Bad night (427)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Beer acquired. Food is cooking

  (1-407): View more from Florida

  Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio

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  (407): Beer acquired. Food is cooking (1-407): Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio http://tfl.nu/4aqs
  Replies (3) Good night (1172) Bad night (321)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.

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  (507): The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER. http://tfl.nu/0t63
  Replies (3) Good night (943) Bad night (198)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely

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  (315): i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely http://tfl.nu/vc4m
  Replies (3) Good night (600) Bad night (470)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.

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  (828): Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it. http://tfl.nu/pw43
  Replies (4) Good night (791) Bad night (181)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.

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  (469): I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some. http://tfl.nu/ar3h
  Replies (1) Good night (451) Bad night (289)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast

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  (302): I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast http://tfl.nu/oogo
  Replies (0) Good night (453) Bad night (189)

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