I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
