Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
lol hangovers are for mortals.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
