But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
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Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
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