no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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