Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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