when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
