Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
