it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize