I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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