I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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