I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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