This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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