took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
