omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
