There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Just invented taco cereal.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
do nipples grow back?
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