Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
